Memory Maker

Memory Maker 2000™

Having trouble studying? Forget where you left your keys? Couldn’t remember the lesson from yesterday? Well, we’ve got a product for you!

The Memory Maker 2000™ will help you keep those synaptic connections you so love in just three easy steps! Insert the product (prerequisite needed – surgery), charge the batteries in the remote (batteries not included), and just press the on button! Forget the words “I forget” forever! The Memory Maker 2000™ is for you!

The Memory Maker 2000™ works on state-of-the-art technology that strengthens bonds between each and every synaptic connection in the brain. The ability to forget will be forgotten! After activating the Memory Maker 2000™ within your brain, you will gain full access to every single possible synapse, and none of those synapses will EVER disconnect. It’s simply amazing! The Memory Maker 2000™ enhances brain function like no other product out there. Say no to those Omega-3 Fatty acids that everyone tells you will be good for brain function. Those pesky infomercials will NEVER get you to buy memory enhancing supplements ever again! The average brain may lose information all the time, especially when you have a bad memory, but with the Memory Maker 2000™ those days are looooong gone!

This product may require some invasive procedures, but the price to pay is much lower than the ultimate gain. Just insert, and you are done!

Starting from just $9,999.99, the Memory Maker 2000™ will change your life forever, I guarantee it!

Warning: This product: may cause severe brain damage, is not FDA Approved, and could completely change your life forever, for the worse. 0 Day Limited Warranty Included. Ethical concerns do not apply, neither do coupons.

 

 

Ok, sorry about that guys, my inner Billie Mays had to come out.

But in all reality, this product could work in the very distant future. Extremely small scanners would have to be invented such that the entire brain could be scanned from within – with this technology at hand, the Memory Maker 2000™ could then release bonding agents that would keep synapses connected, essentially forever. New connections could always be formed with the remaining dendrites and axons, I am sure. When these new memories are made, the small device would again release the bonding agent (internal mechanisms could enable it to make enough of this bonding agent to last well into and after death). This cycle would allow for all memories and information to be stored forever and the human race to advance far past of what we are currently capable. Information centers would no longer be 1 Terabyte Personal Computers, but rather the 2.5 petabyte human mind. This product, or technology, could have extremely useful practical applications but would be beleaguered with a plethora of ethical concerns. Enhancing the human mind, or body, in any way has been frowned upon – genetically engineered corn is fine, but genetically engineered humans are not exactly a Sunday afternoon’s talk. Even PEDs are extremely tabooed and are not permitted in major sports. Creating a complete memory enhancer for the brain would obviously be tagged with a myriad of ethical concerns. However, disregarding ethics, this product could become very useful for anyone and everyone in the human race. We do not all have eidetic memories, but they could be very useful.

This could happen after 2100, considering the extreme technologies – not to mention the necessary prior research – required to build this object.

Memory Maker 2000

9 responses to “Memory Maker”

  1. Carlos Aizenman says:

    Nice! It reminds me of the movie Total Recall (the 1990 version, niot the crappy 2012 one).

  2. Madiha Shafquat says:

    Like you mentioned, this seems to be the exact opposite of my invention! This device would actually be incredibly useful in determining the actual memory capacity of the human brain. Can our brain physically handle remembering everything we’ve ever experienced?

    • Dhruv Mohnot says:

      Well, I do know from my final project research that the brain’s capacity has been estimated to be 2.5 petabytes, with each petabyte being 1024 gigabytes. This would be the equivalent of 300 years of continuous video. So I think the brain can handle all everything we have ever done, learned, experienced in our lifetime.

  3. Fabiana Vilsan says:

    This is so interesting! I would definitely use this technology!

  4. Brooke Nawrocki says:

    I love this post! I feel like this is the type of technology that some people would love to have while others would be wary because of the possible burden of having so much memory. It would be very interesting to know what it would feel like to remember everything!

  5. Swathi Srinivasan says:

    Honestly, this a great invention! This is technology everybody should have. Great job!

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